Treasures of Darkness – No. 2

When was the last time you took a painkiller, even an aspirin? I’m one of these people who will only take a drug when the pain level reaches an eight or nine on the pain scale, with ten being excruciatingly unbearable. My labour in child-birthing definitely surpassed the ten!

When it comes to personal suffering or pain of any kind—physical, emotional or spiritual—I’ve always wanted answers from God. Why this? Why us? Why again? Why? Why? If I can just understand why and make a little sense of it, perhaps I could endure it better. If there was some great purpose for it – like labouring to bear a child – it would feel worth it in the end. Senseless suffering just seems grievous to me.

A  pastor and his wife who are friends, faced the dark abyss of grief when their son was killed tragically just a few years ago. They have struggled and endured suffering like heroes of the faith. In just a short interaction with the pastor, his take on suffering struck me profoundly.

Treasures of Darkness Series – No. 1

It’s an impossible match! They can’t live together in the same house. One has got to go! If I open the door and welcome the guest of fear, it begins to take over my house and turn it into a disaster. It settles quickly on the furniture, makes cluttered, smelly messes and starts damaging fires. Fear will seduce me into all kinds of irrational and unbecoming behaviours.

If I choose to let faith remain in my home, it brings me flowers in a crystal vase and keeps my house clean. It allows fresh lavender breezes through the windows and sweet rest in my pillow-top bed. I live graciously above the uncertainty, because I know that God is my refuge and strength, my ever-present help in trouble.

Sounds so easy. If only! When fear pounds on the door, I can’t always resist it.

A scene in the Count of Monte Cristo captures my imagination.  The main character after wrongly imprisoned for 14 years executes a daring escape while carrying a treasure map. Finding the cove from the map, he dives deep down to the dark ocean bed and recovers chests after chest of treasure – gold and silver, diamonds, coins and all manner of precious gemstones. The former sailor/prisoner then emerges as the Count of Monte Cristo on a mission.

Three years ago, my family plunged into a season of darkness. At the onset, God gave me a promise confirmed by a prophetic voice, which gave hope during uncertainty and financial constraints:

“I will give you the treasures of darkness, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the LORD, the God of Israel, who summons you by name.” Isa. 45:3

How could treasures and darkness co-exist, I pondered? So I watched and waited for some kind of prosperity to materialize out of a dark situation. The darkness continued, but no riches appeared, only manna to sustain us. Still I held on to the promise.